Unpack this on your ~/.netbeans/6.1/config
Warning . it will overwrite your custom themes. Still looking for a better way. I should have used git. If I knew netbeans theme “sharing” was so.. wrong
/netbeans/etc/netbeans.conf
"--laf javax.swing.plaf.metal.MetalLookAndFeel --fontsize 14 -J-Dswing.aatext=true -J-Dswing.metalTheme=steel -J-Dswing.plaf.metal.controlFont=Dialog-plain-14"